May 2023
Potentially Better Than an Oat Milk Skinny Latte
30/05/23 12:29
Potentially Better Than an Oat Milk Skinny Latte
By A.J. Walker
***
Billy hadn’t been on a date for seven years – and that’d barely counted: Jennifer had bailed before her coffee arrived, putting a dent in his fragile confidence. He’d ended up with her coffee. Billy mused that he’d at least learnt that an oat milk skinny latte was every bit as distasteful as it sounded.
Subsequent years had passed in a nothingness blur.
Now he was meeting Cheri to go to The Auction House. He’d not eaten all day in anticipation of a nice meal (maybe two if she departed early).
They met at the station. He was impressed by her timekeeping and her appearance. She looked intelligent and appeared potentially normal.
Cheri smiled when he waved. He’d said he’d wear a white carnation to distinguish himself. He looked exactly like his photo, with or without the flower.
‘William I assume?’ She said nodding at his lapel.
‘Billy, please. I’m assuming you’re Cheri.’
‘Indeed. Can we get a wiggle on? I thought the auction started at two but it’s one. I’m sorry. Don’t want to miss any lots.’
Billy paused. ‘Auction? Thought we were going for a meal.’
‘Didn’t I say the auction house?’
‘Well yeah. But I assumed it was the name of a fancy restaurant.’
Cheri slumped. ‘Really? Didn’t you Dr Google it?’
Billy had. Failing to find the restaurant, he’d assumed it was new.
‘My bad. Assumption is the mother of fuck-up.’
‘And of a hungry boy.’
Billy wondered how loud his protesting belly was.
‘Thought it’d be nice to do something different from a restaurant or bar.’
It certainly was. He ended up buying a broken microscope and a chipped ceramic bowl. Cheri had been disappointed he hadn’t bid on a pair of police handcuffs. But given she had her own in her handbag it wouldn’t matter.
________
300 words Prompt Elements: Reluctant Dater / Auction House / Comedy
***
Billy hadn’t been on a date for seven years – and that’d barely counted: Jennifer had bailed before her coffee arrived, putting a dent in his fragile confidence. He’d ended up with her coffee. Billy mused that he’d at least learnt that an oat milk skinny latte was every bit as distasteful as it sounded.
Subsequent years had passed in a nothingness blur.
Now he was meeting Cheri to go to The Auction House. He’d not eaten all day in anticipation of a nice meal (maybe two if she departed early).
They met at the station. He was impressed by her timekeeping and her appearance. She looked intelligent and appeared potentially normal.
Cheri smiled when he waved. He’d said he’d wear a white carnation to distinguish himself. He looked exactly like his photo, with or without the flower.
‘William I assume?’ She said nodding at his lapel.
‘Billy, please. I’m assuming you’re Cheri.’
‘Indeed. Can we get a wiggle on? I thought the auction started at two but it’s one. I’m sorry. Don’t want to miss any lots.’
Billy paused. ‘Auction? Thought we were going for a meal.’
‘Didn’t I say the auction house?’
‘Well yeah. But I assumed it was the name of a fancy restaurant.’
Cheri slumped. ‘Really? Didn’t you Dr Google it?’
Billy had. Failing to find the restaurant, he’d assumed it was new.
‘My bad. Assumption is the mother of fuck-up.’
‘And of a hungry boy.’
Billy wondered how loud his protesting belly was.
‘Thought it’d be nice to do something different from a restaurant or bar.’
It certainly was. He ended up buying a broken microscope and a chipped ceramic bowl. Cheri had been disappointed he hadn’t bid on a pair of police handcuffs. But given she had her own in her handbag it wouldn’t matter.
________
300 words Prompt Elements: Reluctant Dater / Auction House / Comedy